Sunday, June 1, 2008

Chinese Village Buffet Restaurant, 5-7855 East Saanich Road, Saanichton B.C, (250) 652-1382

I was busted and scolded by the manager for taking pictures. Good thing she caught me after I had just snapped off about 15 in 45 seconds.

After my paparazzi session with the buffet line, me and Donald settled in and, at first, were very pleased. However, it did not take much time before the major flaws of this buffet started to come forward.

Fountain drinks, cappucino , slushees, ice cream.

Weird tasting balls, runny meat dishes and smelly spring rolls screamed failing grade, while fountain drinks, chef's special chicken and high quality seafood dishes pleaded for a pass.

Lets start with the sweet and sour pork, which was filled to the brim of the tray and almost spilled over with freshness, but tasted like waterlogged pork and nothing else. I believe this was due to the sweet and sour sauce being extremely runny, and not adhering to the pork like it's supposed too.

The teriyaki meatballs at first glance, look like flavor packed morsels just waiting to slide down the esophagus, when in reality they were extremely salty and over flavored, and did not have the elasticity I was expecting. The balls crumbled with an odd consistency, and their overbearing flavor spilling into my mouth that easily, was not pleasant.

And by far the worst tasting spring rolls I have ever eaten belong to Chinese Village. Those little previously frozen Safeway pack looking motherfuckers did nothing to make my mouth water, and when i realized they tasted like actual fucking garbage, it did not take long to realize there was something seriously wrong. This almost ruined my entire experience, and left a scar that may never go away. Would you like to know how bad it tasted? Think rotten cabbage with celery string texture sandwiched between undercooked pastry.

Donald Kennedy CHIMES IN

Wow is this place mediocre. It's not often that I'll give a bad review to a buffet that has Screamer capabilities, but Chinese Village was beyond underwhelming. The meatballs were like pudding, the egg rolls tasted like fried moldy newspaper strands, and the deep fried scallions tasted like rejects from the Highliner factory.

The ginger beef was spicy, but ultimately blahzay, and none of the vegetable dishes were really worth seconds.

The only dish I really enjoyed here was the Chef's Special Chicken: crunchy skin and flavour akin to what you'd get in a Japanese box meal.

Chinese Village isn't on the horrendous level that Wing's is, but it sure wouldn't be a long fall to get there.

I'm still appalled that this place costs almost $15.

Price for Dinner: $14.60


Jordan Stout said...

I've got to suggest a visit to the Lotus Pond on Johnson St.

For a relaxing buddhist buffet experience with an entirely vegan selection, its definitely a unique take on the buffet world. 230-300 each day is half price.

i'm a big fan of the place with its quiet low-key atmosphere and penchant for attracting good looking hippie girls. food-warmth is the only issue i ever find with the locale - but i generally forgive & forget.

dk said...

Lotus is a good cheap eat, and the scenery is often palatable as well...

but it's not all you can eat.

Gaetano said...

i thought about this, and i change my mind. im down for a lotus pond review. if u guys want to hit it and do a review on it that would be cool. we just won't rate it the same, or at all, just do a general review on it due to popular demand.

David said...

The meatballs and springrolls are also not to my taste. The ginger beef, shrimp dishes, chef chicken and various veggie dishes are, however, very good. As is the fountain/dessert compliment. Owners/staff are nice, friendly and attentive. Not deluxe, but certainly deserving of a far better grade than given here. Perhaps 3.8 to 4.0 out of 5.